Want to Project Confidence in the Workplace? Don't Make These 5 Communication Mistakes

By Marissa Russell

In the world of business, appearing insecure to clients, colleagues, and superiors is the kiss of death. People want to do business with those who project confidence, and they shirk away from those who second guess themselves.

It is important, therefore, to ensure that we are not subconsciously apologizing for our power in the way we communicate with others. Here are five communication mistakes that make you seem inexperienced and insecure:

1. Negotiating with people over decisions that should be final. Going back and forth with people when you’ve made a decision brands you as someone who can’t make forward progress without unanimous approval. Once you have determined the wisest choice to make, your decision is not a negotiation--it is a verdict.

It is perfectly fine for people to have a lively dialogue during a brainstorming session, but after you've made a final decision, don't continue to engage in back and forth arguments with people who do not respect your decision. By refusing to engage in unnecessary negotiations, you will over time teach people to respect your authority.

2. Apologizing for things you shouldn’t be ashamed of. There is no need to apologize for asking questions, holding others accountable for inappropriate behavior, being nervous, or other things that do not warrant repentance. Apologizing for minutiae makes you look insecure and on edge. Ask yourself if you are truly remorseful for what you have done, or if you are saying “sorry” to brace yourself from backlash. Only apologize for things that you feel guilty for. Don’t use apologies as a shield to protect you from criticism.

3. Minimizing the value of your statements. “I just think…” “I kind of feel like…” “I could be wrong, but…” Minimizers are used in sentences when people fear that they will sound arrogant or harsh, and want to soften the authoritative tone of the statement. Minimizers are problematic since they weaken your point before anyone even has a chance to challenge it. Instead, confidently stand by what you say. You can always correct yourself later if you realize that your statement was inaccurate.

4. Offering to clarify statements that don't require clarification. “Do you know what I mean?” or “Did that make any sense?” When you anticipate that you are appearing inarticulate to others, you undercut the validity of the point you are trying to make. The sad part is that these questions are often tagged along to statements that make perfect sense and need no further clarification. If what you have said is difficult to comprehend, let the person you are speaking to tell you that. Make your point with confidence, and leave the responsibility of getting further clarification on the listener.

5. Rushing to respond. Insecure people hurry to respond to others because they live in fear that they are not important enough for anyone to patiently wait on their response. Rushing to respond to people puts you at a greater risk for putting your foot in your mouth, unintentionally interrupting someone, and looking anxious. Wait at least two seconds before responding to questions or statements. It affords you the opportunity to prevent embarrassing verbal blunders and it also positions you as an authoritative person who is unintimidated by silence.

These communication mistakes are small, yet significant. Insecurity is omnipresent in today’s world, so you will instantly stand out as a cut above the rest by correcting these mistakes and projecting confidence in the way you speak.