You Bad, Bad Businessperson

I know it can't be just me who's had this experience. I get an email message out of the blue, from a person who might be interested in working with me. We exchange some information via email and then I'm asked for an estimate of the cost of the work. In my case this is easy - it's a keynote presentation the lady has in mind. My keynote rate has been the same for a while. It's $X, so I tell her via an email message, "The cost is $X, plus travel." Oh dear, she writes back. We're a not-for-profit organization. Can the cost be any lower? Goodness gracious, I write back. It wasn't obvious that it was a charitable event we'd been discussing. Of course I can adjust the keynote rate in that case. I give her a new price, 30% lower. It is a shame, she writes back. The price is still too high for us. That is okay, I write back. I wish you a wonderful event. Perhaps our paths will cross again. All the best of luck to you. I go on with my day.... ...and the lady writes back one more time. My goodness, she writes. We are disappointed. We had heard that you were a great supporter of causes like ours. We had heard that you were compassionate and caring. What the heck? Oh dear. No, you heard wrong, lady -- I am conniving and ruthless. Where does her email message come from, which planet? Evidently, my message "have a great event" made her angry. She wanted me to say "Well, I shall lower the price yet again! What can you afford?" This is absurd. You call the plumber, the plumber shows up, you don't guilt-trip the plumber, saying "Forgive me for believing you really cared about helping people get their drains clear!" The business is what it is. Do plumbers give discounts to not-for-profit organizations? Perhaps they do. They quote the rate, and the person who needs a plumber says "Yes, please come" or "No, that won't work." It's binary. Whence the guilt inducement? It's ridiculous. A friend of mine said what we never want to hear, "Bet it was a woman. A guy wouldn't try that." Ouch. It was a woman, in fact. I sent the briefest, breeziest reply I could think of, rather than rush to respond with "But I DO care, I DO!" It's ridiculous. My bio and my track record are easy to access. Guilt is not a big motivator for me, not in a situation like that. I hear from graphic designers and other content-and-creative type people with stories like this all the time. The word that springs to mind for me is "sniffy." A person gets sniffy, insinuating that you, evil businessperson, are flawed and mercenary for charging a fee that doesn't work for this person or his or her business. It's not just a mismatch - you're in the wrong for having the audacity to charge what you charge. We need to get good at putting major distance between ourselves and these kinds of people. On the off-chance the lady finds the money to pay my low-low not-for-profit rate, I'll be sure to be busy on the date of that event. I always say life is long, but it's still too short to get mixed up with people who will play you like that - or, more accurately, try to play you. I don't know your mom personally, but I know she didn't raise anyone who'd be snowed by a low-rent guilt-trip approach to business.