AllBusiness.com
Career and family

Working Moms Have Two Jobs: Here’s How to Stay Balanced and Sane

Women In Business

Do you think your work-life would be easier if you married a billionaire? Forget it. Even Melinda Gates had to ask her husband to drop off their kids at school. Other than the difference of a few billion dollars, I’ll bet your life isn’t that much different from Melinda’s life.

When you are a working mom outside the home and a working wife inside the home, you have a lot of decisions to make and it sometimes may seem like your work never ends. One way to thrive professionally is to better manage your home work.

Work within your job description

Most statistics say that women do more housework than men, but I say we shouldn’t keep score. Instead hire out the work to professionals. If you are a working mom, you are bringing in a paycheck. Expecting more work from you, like cleaning toilets and vacuuming—unless that is your preference—is unreasonable. It’s not in your job description to do housework, in addition to a 40-hour workweek.

Figure out your budget and then determine which cleaning tasks you hate doing. Hire other people to do those tasks, so that the only lifting you're doing is the keystrokes to Venmo your payment.

What if you get pushback from your husband? Your answer is simply, “I physically can’t do any more.” A loving husband won’t argue with that point. A frugal husband is free to pick up the slack.

How to say no

I never fault people when they ask for a discount, ask me to do something, or make any other request. I also realize that I don’t have to say yes. Many working moms, especially in the home, feel guilty when they say no. I don’t. I’ve learned how to say no and you can, too. First, set expectations.

Teach your children to take care of themselves. They can take responsibility for making their own lunches, making their bed, putting toys away, or any number of tasks. Your job is to expect that they can do these things. When you teach them how to do things, they will not ask you to do for them what they can do for themselves. You may have to remind them from time to time that it’s their job, not yours. Be firm. You are doing no one any favors by creating needy children who are utterly dependent on your work. You don’t have the time and they need to learn to accomplish tasks for themselves.

Other Articles From AllBusiness.com:

Don’t work 24-7

Too many women have the misconception that they are Superwoman. They’re not. Even Superwoman didn’t work 24-7. You can’t work 24-7 and maintain your sanity. So what do you do when you leave your professional work only to come home to work at home? Set your home work hours.

It can be as simple as telling your children (as I did) what time you stop working for them when you’re at home. I told my daughter if she needed help with homework, she had better ask me before 9 p.m. After 9, I was off the clock. I even said if she asked after 9 p.m., “Sorry, I’m off the clock.” I trained my daughter to ask me for help earlier when my brain wasn’t fried and I could offer some help.

You can’t be on 24-7. Figure out when you'll be on and off the clock? Set it, inform your children, and enforce it.

The best paid job

Working moms have jobs from 9-to-5 and another job meets them when they come home to family. That home work is more about preserving your sanity and energy so you can experience the joy of your family.

Your home work will pay you differently—you'll be paid with emotional support from your loving family. The confidence you will get is worth more than a lot of money. And you’ll need that confidence when you’re working on your next big deal at your 9-to-5 job.

RELATED: 5 Obstacles Women Face in Business

Profile: Maura Schreier-Fleming

Maura Schreier-Fleming is president of Best@Selling, a sales training and sales consulting company. She works with business and sales professionals to increase sales and earn larger profits. She is the author of Real-World Selling for Out-of-this-World Results and Monday Morning Sales Tips. Maura focuses on sales strategies and tactics that lead to better sales results. Maura is a sales expert for WomenSalesPros. She is part of their group of top sales experts who inspire, educate, and develop salespeople and sales teams.She speaks internationally on influence, selling skills, and strategic selling at trade association and sales meetings, demonstrating how her principles can be applied to get results. She successfully worked for over 20 years in the male-dominated oil industry with two major corporations, beginning at Mobil Oil and ending at Chevron Corp. She was Mobil Oil’s first female lubrication engineer in the U.S. and was one of Chevron’s top five salespeople in the U.S. having sold over $9 million annually. Maura writes several columns to share her sales philosophies. She's been quoted in the New York Times, Selling Power, and Entrepreneur.