Sexual Harassment and Sales: What to Do and What Not to Do
What do Harvey Weinstein, Roy Price, and other not so well-known men have in common? They were accused of sexual harassment at work and ultimately lost their jobs. Does this mean that women won’t be subject to this kind of mistreatment in the future? I’m not so sure. If you’re a woman in the world of sales, you need to be prepared for these situations. They’re not going away.
Liquor and business are a bad combination
I was once being considered for a big promotion. I was at an annual meeting where the senior leader was also attending. My mentor told me that the leader was going to speak with me at some point during the meeting to interview me for the new job. There was an evening function with an open bar, and that’s where the senior manager approached me to see if we could talk. He suggested we meet in his room.
You’re probably thinking, “Danger, Will Robinson!” or something to that effect. I was young and unsure of corporate protocol, but I trusted my mentor. Certainly he would have known where the interview was going to be held.
We went to the senior leader’s room. I scanned the room and found the chair that could seat just one person. That one person was me. I quickly saw that this senior leader had too much to drink. The interview consisted of a monologue about how powerful he was and how he could fire me in an instant if he wanted to. I remember thinking, “What has this got to do with the job he’s considering me for?” and “What a jerk he is.”
I asked questions about the job, and he quickly changed the subject back to the most important person in the room—him. I realized this interview was going nowhere. I said, “Well, this has been interesting, but I’ve got to get back to the meeting.” I left and told my mentor what happened; he was shocked and angry. I later learned that this senior leader was on shaky ground and was sidelined from future promotions. Today he probably would have been fired.
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Create the right environment or cut it short
My first mistake was agreeing to go to this man's room. I didn’t think that he was a predator, and I didn’t realize he had been drinking. I should not have had to consider either issue, but I should have considered both. I should have said, because of the possibility of him being a predator, “Let’s talk somewhere else like the lobby (or somewhere more quiet and still public). That would be better.”
Avoid putting yourself in a situation that could become unprofessional, especially when you are alone. Stop the meeting immediately when you realize that the person has had too much to drink. Never agree to a business discussion with someone who has had too much to drink.
Nip it immediately
Some harassment, however, is not sexual harassment. I once worked for a manager with an uncontrollable temper—he would yell at anyone who displeased him. In one meeting he yelled a threat to a male engineer unless he did what the manager wanted him to do. The threat was so vulgar I can’t even repeat it. I asked the engineer later why he allowed the manager to speak to him that way. The engineer replied, “He didn’t mean it. “ I replied, “He did.”
I was caught off guard the first time I was inappropriately yelled at by this manager. Many months later, when the manager yelled at me again, I immediately shut him down. I said in a very controlled voice, “If you can’t talk in a civil tone, I don’t need to listen.” He yelled, “You can come back when you’re less emotional.” I replied, “I’ll come back when you’re less emotional.” I left his office. He never yelled at me again. My mistake was not stopping the bad behavior immediately. Bullies have targets. Don’t allow yourself to be the target.
I hope your sales organization is free of harassment. If not, don’t put yourself in a situation where harassment can occur and don’t accept being a target. That’s the best way to focus on your selling.
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