Restaurant Etiquette: Are Your Manners on Your Mind?

I see legions of travelers dispatched to points around the globe with instructions to impress new or important clients. These travelers meticulously choose their flights, their wardrobes, and their hotels.

But the one thing they routinely bumble is their behavior in the restaurant they've chosen to impress their client.

When you arrive at the restaurant, think about your cell phone before you even leave the car.  Will you need it inside?  I mean, will you REALLY need it inside?  Focus on your client, not on other callers.  Unless you're a bored 12-year-old, there's just no excuse for texting in a restaurant during a meal.

If the restaurant you've chosen takes reservations, and you've reserved an appropriate table, then good for you.  If you didn't have time to make them, then hopefully you've chosen a fairly quiet place with an excellent bar area so you can sit quietly and enjoy a beverage or two for an hour or so, in comfort. 

Context is important when sorting through any recommendations you may get about a restaurant.  Hearing "good things" about a place from a mother of three might mean that the restaurant employs clowns on stilts that walk around the room entertaining children with balloon animals.  Not a good impression for a professional client...

As soon as you're seated, slide your napkin from underneath the silverware and place it immediately in your lap.  Tucking it into your shirt as a "bib" is perfectly acceptable -- if you’re three years old.  Leave your silverware in front of you, as it was before you slid out the napkin.  If you're the host, you might ask if anyone would like some wine.  It's good to know whether you'll need to order a carafe or bottle, or if everyone has their own tastes in mind when the waiter first approaches the table.

Do serious wine connoisseurs still sniff the cork when the waiter presents it?  Sure they do, but not as often as they used to.  Wineries are shedding the traditional cork stoppers for synthetic corks and bottle caps more often these days. Still, if you've ordered a bottle for the table and the waiter presents you with the cork, just give it a quick sniff. If the cork doesn't smell like vinegar, give him the nod to pour.

Some restaurants will allow you to bring your own special bottle of wine or champagne to dinner, but if you expect the waiter to serve it, you might very well encounter a "corkage fee."  Even if you plan to uncork and serve it yourself, you would certainly want to call ahead before doing so.  Different states have different laws regarding this sort of thing.

Don’t pay too much attention to the menu until you've heard the specials.  There are almost always daily chef-prepared specials that feature a fresh local ingredient.  Chefs are very proud of these dishes, and you should consider it a treat if they have one to your liking.  It's ok to switch side ingredients on a menu item (for example), but if a chef went to the trouble to match a sweet-corn soufflé' to some fresh Maryland Blue Crab because they complement each other, you won't want to embarrass yourself by asking, "Can I get french-fries instead of that corn thing?  With some ketchup?"

When you do finish a meal, place your fork (tines down) and your knife across the top edge of the plate, bisecting an imaginary line between 11 and 1 o'clock.  Don't call attention to the fact that you're through, because others may still be enjoying their meal.  If the service is good, they'll clear your plate for you at an appropriate time.  Leave your napkin in your lap, there is no need to toss it in a wad on the table in front of you; besides, you may wish to order dessert or coffee.

Regarding the service, any issues should be addressed privately with the restaurant manager.  Excuse yourself during the meal, and discuss the problem quietly with a manager so the issue might be resolved.  Getting combative or confrontational with the restaurant staff will not impress anyone at your table.

EXTRA:  Please feel free to leave comments on this article! If you have questions for Ken regarding business travel, hotels, airplanes, etc, please send him a "Tweet" on his twitter account.  You can also follow Ken on Twitter @foodbreeze!