Are you having a little less intimacy than you had with your spouse five years ago? If so, you are not alone!
Seems that married couples have slowed down in the bedroom since 2003 – at least the 5,000 couples who were recently surveyed by Baby Center.
Are we too tired? Overwhelmed? Trying to do too much all at once? Or have relationships really changed since then, so much so that we don’t need as much cuddle time at the end of the day?
One therapist felt that the downward trend of no sex for the couples had to do with stress. When you are wondering if you are going to be able to pay the mortgage or clothe the kids, chances are getting frisky with hubby isn’t on your mind.
Thirty seven percent of those who talked about having sex after baby stated in 2008 that they were just too tired to warm up to the idea, while only 30% of respondents felt that way five years ago.
And while mom would prefer to sleep (38%) on Saturday night rather than make love to dad (18%), dad would really like to cuddle up to mom for some lovin’ (30%)!
Mom stated the reason the lovin’ has died is because she is tired all of the time; dad says that they aren’t making love like they used to because his partner does not seem interested.
So, if you aren’t feeling randy but your spouse is, what can you do? The time-old tips remain the same. Set the mood. Try different times and rooms, rather than always waiting until the kids are in bed and it is dark outside (when you are most tired!) Have a date night. Get more sleep so you feel better (easier said than done, particularly when you have young infants!) Remember the romance (write him a letter, send her some flowers, or just do the dishes or another chore for your spouse-when you have kids, having your spouse help out around the house is really a great romance-builder!)
If you are still finding it difficult to get cozy with your mate, perhaps it is time to head to the doctor. Women do face enormous swings in hormones during and after pregnancy and can find a lack of sexual desire thanks to these shifts. Sometimes this is due to something physical rather than something mental (or rather than lack of sleep) and a doctor might be able to sort that out for you.
Want to read the rest of the survey results? Check them out here!