Hard Lessons in Office Politics for Women Professionals

I was surprised recently -- and I’m not often surprised -- to see what goes on at some businesses. Imagine that you're working for an organization and being marginalized. Only you don't know it's happening.

Would that bother you? It should because your salary and career will suffer when you’re marginalized. I'll explain what happened in the hope that you can keep the same thing from happening to you.

I was meeting with a prospect. He had previously left a large organization where he worked as a manager because he got tired of the politics and wanted to work for himself. During our meeting we compared experiences. That’s when he told me that the ways men disenfranchise women at work can be very subtle.

He told me that as a manager his subordinates would often suggest that he golf with them. Not wanting to show any favoritism, he would suggest that the group golf together. In his group, most of the women didn’t golf. So even though he invited them, they were not likely to attend.

That meant the guys in the office had a weekend of bonding and building friendships -- all without the women. Why does that matter? Because I’ve seen all too often how businesses go about awarding promotions.

Of all the employees whose work is good, the promotion goes to the one who is most well-known, liked, and trusted.  Weekend golf games are the perfect venue to get known, liked, and trusted. Women who don’t golf lose.

When he told me this, I thought about the options that women have. There aren't many. It’s not like you can suggest to your manager that he go with you to a spa. Or maybe a trip to the nail salon? Hardly.

Golf can be a real business issue for women. If you find that your team goes golfing regularly, I would take up the sport. You can’t miss the opportunity to build relationships with your manager.

It’s different if golf is just an occasional team-building activity. When I was part of a corporate team, most of our team-building activities were golf at our sales meetings. I was not a golfer. My golfing (if you could call it that) was painful to watch. Several of the guys, however, were just as bad as I was.

 I didn’t think it was effective for me to be “playing” golf. I told my boss that golfing was a waste for me, and I should do something else. He agreed. Several of the guys actually wanted to be relieved of the golf game, too, and they either read during the afternoon or hiked around the resort properties.

Another situation that sidelines women is when managers take the group to lunch. You would think that managers would be sensitive to women with their choice of restaurants. Often, that's not the case. There are many business groups that include both males and females who eat at Hooters. 

Hooters -- no surprise here -- is a restaurant that makes some women uncomfortable.

If your manager takes the group to Hooters, you really have to decide how to speak up. If you can suggest an alternative restaurant, I would certainly be ready to do so. If not, you can privately tell your manager that you’re uncomfortable eating there if that’s how you feel. Either way, managers should pick more neutral restaurants.

Office politics can be a subtle activity. Yet politics is a mandatory activity if you want to get ahead. Knowing what potential problems to look for is the first step. The next step is making sure that you get -- and stay -- involved.

Maura Schreier-Fleming is a sales strategist and founder of Best@Selling, a sales training and consulting company. She wrote Monday Morning Sales Tips and works with sales professionals who want to sell more and get more business