Do Emotions Fit into Business Management?
Recently I had a conversation with a friend that had attended a monthly business meeting and the discussion turned to whether you should ever let your emotions or feelings get involved in the decisions you make as a business owner.
In the realm of business we work with many people. Employees, customers, vendors, other business owners, and really anyone who touches what it is we do. In the midst of that there is bound to be a point in time where we connect emotionally for some particular reason. I once had a competitor who ran into really hard times financially. Not sure how all that got to where it had, but eventually the IRS came in on a Friday and seized the operation. Game over. No matter what that means to you from the business side, it has to have some impact on the personal. The devastation was understandably unbearable to this woman, but it hit me pretty hard also.
During this meeting of local business owners or managers who get together to discuss things, this topic came up. A few persons were dead against it saying you never let your personal feelings get involved in business. Sounds like inexperience, or the completion of a chapter in the business 101 series. Sure it’s not good practice to mix the two but the truth is it’s in front of you every day. If an employee gets hurt or something happens to a staff’s child you need to be there. Staff need to feel supported, and want to be a part of a company that genuinely cares. Trying to separate the natural from business leaves you looking like a cold-hearted scrooge who cares about nothing except making money. You may have staff but I guarantee they’re just waiting for a better opportunity to get out.
There is of course in the day-to-day operations, a point of separation. We often tell middle managers who have the most direct contact with operations staff, that being a leader is not the same as being a friend. Leaders have responsibilities to set expectations, hold people accountable and deliver the mission and vision of the company. You can’t operate as a high level leader by being everyone’s buddy. However, genuine caring, understanding and recognizing the boundaries of leading versus trying to get everyone to like you, is different.
Staff want genuine leaders, with structure, and consistency and mentoring. All that needs to come with a focus and a plan. Things will break down, and this is where having expectations makes the big difference. If you can’t have those difficult conversations when an employee doesn’t meet the expectations, then you will be seen as a poor leader by the rest of the staff. If you have been leading by being everyone friend, then how will you transition to the take charge position you need to be in, when things fall apart.
I once hired a young woman who the customers just loved. Problem was, her personal life was a mess. Finally after trying to work with her, and then ultimately getting her bailed out of an arrest, I had to say good bye. Too much personal involvement for me. You can’t fix everyone’s life running your business.
Everyone wants to be liked. We all want to have others view us in a positive light and look up us as leaders when that’s our role. Employees want their leader to have empathy for them, they want you to care, but you have to separate the part that allows you to lead, but still be empathetic and caring. Tough job, but the rewards from a team that is productive and motivated, who understand the expectations, and are fun to work with, are really great!
