We’ve been reading dire predictions of the national disaster that will occur if our deficit keeps climbing. And everyone seems to think it will. The Congressional Budget Office says that by the end of 2020 U.S. debt will reach $15 trillion, which is 67 percent of GDP. Apparently this is a bad thing. Soon to follow will be stratospheric interest payments on the debt, then currency shock, inflation and the highest prime rates outside of Commercial Bank of Zimbabwe. But we’re not worried. Think about it. Just like AIG, Citigroup, Bank of America, etc., etc., the U.S. is too big to fail. It’ll never happen. China is going to foreclose on its biggest customer? Nope. Who else is going to buy all their stuff? So relax. Your bonus (i.e. tax credit) is on its way.
America’s cushest gigs. What kind of benefits do you get at your job? If your list includes Taster’s Choice and “all the toiletpaper I can steal,” you might want to shoot your resume over to one of the 100 best companies to work for. Like software firm SAS, which offers perks like unlimited sick days, a medical facility staffed by four doctors and 10 nurses, a library, a natatorium and a gym the size of a Walmart. Us, we’re self-employed so we get…let’s see. An entertainment lounge, refreshment center and unlimited goofing-off on the internet. (We’re not sure what a natatorium is but we’re certain we don’t have one.)
Your own business? Not so cush. If you went into business for yourself awhile back and you’d now like to go out of business, well, don’t start eyeing that Cabo timeshare just yet. Business-for-sale transactions were down a whopping 28 percent in 2009, reports BizBuySell.com. So looks like you may have to hold onto that frogurt shop a little longer.
Wives are getting uppity. We don’t have wives of our own but if we did, we’d be happy if they made more money than us. We’d be, like, trophy husbands. How cool would that be? And it just may happen, since a new survey by the Pew Research Center titled “The Rise of Wives” finds that more and more men these days “are married to women whose education and income exceed their own.” (Pew didn’t survey us. We probably would’ve lowered the curve.)