Are you happy? If you’re a woman you just might not be. Marcus Buckingham is the author of Find Your Strongest Life: What the Happiest and Most Successful Women Do Differently. What did he find? That women have become less happy in the last 40 years. He may be right in what he found. Women have to know that they’re wrong.
What do you think when you look around at other people? Do you complain about your work life balance? Are you angry that someone else got a promotion? Do you think, “If only I could have what they have?”
Complaining without action is a waste of time. If you’re angry when things happen to other people, just know that everything happens for a reason and for the best. I’m not just saying that. I’ve been fired, laid off, shoved out and every other combination of corporate intrigue you can think of. I can sincerely say that everything happens for the best. It just doesn’t look like it at the time. Trust me, it will later on.
If you spend a lot of energy going after what other people have, you’re going to be unhappy. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t strive to reach goals of buying certain things that bring you joy. I love a great restaurant meal just like the next food-loving, dishwashing-hating woman. Even a nice new piece of clothing (that I get on sale) will bring me joy.
What I am saying is that if you think that the way to be happy is to acquire things then you will be disappointed and unhappy. More stuff is not going to fill your soul with happiness. That first feeling of joy from your new stuff will evaporate faster than water on a hot skillet.
Instead of wanting what other people have and acquiring more stuff, I know what makes me happy. It’s surrounding myself with people who care about me and showing them how much I care for them.
My father passed away less than a week ago. He was one of the greatest guys in my life. The other is my husband. You have to adore someone who thinks you are perfect. That was my Dad.
My Dad appreciated the smallest things that I did for him. If I brought him coffee from Dunkin’ Donuts, his favorite coffee, he smiled so brightly. Despite his being very sick the last five years of his life, he never complained. It was just the opposite. He told me how much he loved me.
I sat with him and my sister just a few months ago. It was a beautiful afternoon and we were sitting on a patio one afternoon looking at the flowers in the garden. He was in his wheel chair and was very tired, which was a symptom of his illness.
I told him, “I’m so happy now, just sitting here with you and Leslie. It doesn’t get any better than this.” He nodded slowly, smiled warmly and said, “Yes.”