I was really interested in a discussion that took place on The View the other day. (Hey, I’ve already admitted to my guilty pleasure of watching this show, so now I am going to use the excellent topics I see in my blog posts, since many of them really do pertain to working mothers!)
The conversation stemmed around the way that women often feel overextended. The question: Do you do what you have to do or what you want to do?
One of the hosts made the comment that as she gets older she has found that she does more of the things that she wants to do. I can’t recall which host made this comment, but I found myself agreeing with her. At least, at first.
Someone then made this comment: Do you make commitments with friends-say for dinner, or a get together-when you are already too booked? If you do, and you are already feeling overwhelmed, then why are you making these other commitments?
I have found in the past year or so, probably since having my second baby and really growing stronger with my company, that I have started to back out of these types of commitments. I feel bad about it. I know that to really nurture a friendship you have to make a point of going out with friends. If you want to start a new friendship, which I’ve had to do since we moved last year, you must do the same thing.
Honestly, though, I don’t have the energy at the end of the day to go out and do these things. First of all, I’m working all day long either taking care of the kids, the house, other responsibilities or my company. Then I have class one night a week, and while I enjoy the content-advanced web design-I am so tired by Thursday night when I go to class. Of course I liven up once there, as I’m sure I would if I were to go out and see a movie with friends, but thinking about going out twice in one week? Crazy!
So I’ve gotten bad about keeping in touch with or going out with friends. Yet I can’t seem to figure out how I can fit everything that I want to do into my busy life.
This troubles me. I know that I have a great group of friends that I’ve made here, and lately they have been asking me to go out, see a movie, or even offering to watch my kids so I can get my nails done or have a little time to myself. Sometimes I wonder if I look completely frazzled or tired, they seem so nice about doing this for me! And yet as much as I really want to have a girl’s night out, or even some alone time, I’m finding it difficult to gather up the energy to do this.
So this Monday I’m tossing this question out to you: Do you find that you are overextending yourself in order to maintain friendships? Once you do keep the date, do you feel refreshed and rejuvenated after?
I know that I would, if I could only get up the energy to get out the door on these nights.
As my daughter’s holiday tape sings, Just put one foot in front of the other . . . but what happens when you are just so tired you can’t even get that foot off of the floor!