After reading that Wall Street Journal article on anger management that I referenced last week, I got kind of curious about what other writers have written about anger and emotional intelligence. After all, anger is a powerful emotion and try as we might to stay aware of our emotions, manage our reactions, and remain open to the other person’s point of view, for most of us there is a certain point at which we get angry enough to want to get loud — or get even.
In nosing around the Internet, I came across this blog posting about “decoding” both the triggers for and purposes of anger, which I found to be really interesting. It’s based on Myers-Briggs types — so if you haven’t ever taken that personality test, some parts of the blog may sound like gobbledeegook. But read it anyway — I think the whole idea of deconstructing the anger (e.g., “why am I feeling threatened? Why am I feeling attacked?”) is enormously helpful in learning how to handle anger constructively. As the author, Robert R. Pearman, PhD, writes, “At its root, anger is an expression that you are unable (for various reasons) to achieve a certain goal or objective. Anger is a’ ‘feedback energy’ to your psyche that things are not going as you might like or expect.”
Next up: How to use that feedback energy to good effect.