Flight Awards

"Those were the days."  I heard my great grandmother say that when I was about three or four.  I heard all four grand-parents say it, my parents said it, and I always vowed I would live in the present and that I would never have the occasion to say that.  Nope, not me… I would take the high road and never stoop so low as to criticize modern music, utter the phrase, "these dang kids today," or audibly sigh and say, "Those were the days."

Well, from the mountains I will now shout it as loudly as Edith Bunker used to sing it with her husband Archie sitting on the piano bench next to her, "Those were the days!" 

"And you knew where you were then

 Girls were girls, and men were men,

 Mr, we could use a man like Herbert Hoover again…"

Air travel used to be special.  People dressed up to board a plane; they wore suits and ties, nice dresses, hats, gloves, the works.  Airlines bent over backwards to attract and even reward their loyal customers.  They printed and sent out very nice certificates to people who flew all the way around the world, or who flew north of the Arctic Circle.  Blankets and pillows were standard issue to all passengers, along with glass tumblers, porcelain coffee mugs or tea cups, silverware,  dinner plates, linen napkins and even shot glasses with the airline's logo on them, available at the piano bars upstairs in the business class cabin of a 747.

Well, you can kiss that stuff goodbye.

There's plenty of blame to go around here, terrorists cost us quite a few amenities.  I place most of the blame however on the airlines in the U.S.A. and their CEOs.  You see, most airlines around the rest of the world have unbelievable customer service and they still serve full meals on real china.  In the US, we're too busy cow-towing to stock holders for that extra .03 per share every quarter to take a chance on crazy things like pretzels, peanuts, or pillows.

As I write this, my "mileage since enrollment" total with NWA is perilously close to one million miles.  I called the Platinum Elite help line and asked them, "Is there any sort of bonus, gift, or amenity for your customers who fly a million miles on your airline?"  "Yes," she said!  I got all excited!  I'd heard rumors that million milers are awarded such things as membership to the World Club Lounge at airports around the world!  I asked her what the gift was and she told me, "Your new frequent flier membership card will have a small "M" printed on it, and you'll receive a pen in the mail."  A pen?  A lousy pen?  "It's a nice pen…" she said.  I asked about membership to the World Club Lounge, "We used to do that," she replied, "but not anymore."

*Sigh*  Those were the days…