Shoes on ... or off? What kind of holiday party host are you?: (As if you don't already have enough to worry about)

Dec. 12--Entertaining in the winter requires hosts to take a stand on one issue: wet boots.

Etiquette experts say it is rude to ask guests to remove their shoes, but that doesn't stop many Minnesotans from insisting on a no-shoe policy at their homes -- even during parties. Hosts don't want their floors and carpets soiled; guests don't want their carefully selected ensembles deconstructed.

There's no sidestepping the controversy this holiday season, with surveys, including one conducted by Deloitte, predicting a significant increase in home entertaining.

Laura Barclay, president of the Etiquette Centre of Minneapolis, is quite clear about what's right: "Asking guests to remove their shoes and walk around in stocking feet or worse, barefoot, is inappropriate and in poor taste."

Anti-shoes-in-the-house hostess Erin Pavlica, of St. Paul, remains unconvinced.

"I don't care what an etiquette expert says," said Pavlica, who also dismisses the grumbles of her husband's family. "I clean the floors. I have a 2-year-old and a 4-year-old crawling on the floors. The nice thing to do is to take your shoes off."

Countered event planner Geri Wolfe, "That's what rugs are for." As an extra precaution, Wolfe, who owns Style Laboratory in Minneapolis, suggested leaving rags by the door for people to wipe their shoes. "Let them trample all over my white carpeting. If someone is a guest, it's about their comfort, not mine."

Cultural custom is the one exception to

the Etiquette Centre's shoes-on stance. And guests do bear some responsibility. Barclay said women attending house parties should avoid wearing spike heels that can damage hardwood floors.

Leah Drury, of Minneapolis, isn't leaving it to chance after her new kitchen floor was dinged during an indoor caroling party last year. "There were literally hundreds of heel marks," she said. This year's invitation urged guests to wear flats. "I'm not opposed to shoes indoors; I always like to keep mine on," Drury said. "But in this case, I felt like modifications were necessary."

Good thing Mary Jo Koski, of Eagan, wasn't invited. Koski marched right past the mound of shoes at the door of a recent house party without removing her high-heel boots. "I'm barely 5-foot-2," she said. "The boots are part of my outfit."

Heather DuPont can relate -- she has a closet filled with designer heels. But at her Stillwater home, Christian Louboutin, Michael Kors and Helmut Lang are restricted to the entryway.

"Our no-shoe policy definitely extends to parties. It's about cleanliness and health," DuPont said.

Her husband, an even bigger stickler about shoes in the house, posts a sign before parties and makes sure a bench is available so shoe removal is more convenient.

Loosen up, advised Tonka Bay hostess extraordinaire Teri Bennett, whose entertaining skills were recognized nationally a few years back as a Domestic Diva finalist on NBC's "Today" show.

"If all you can see is the sand on the bottom of your guests' shoes, you probably shouldn't entertain," Bennett said. "Love the people who come to your house -- that's why you're entertaining them."

Allison Kaplan can be reached at 651-228-5116.

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