Caloric Intake, Sans Trans-Fats, Signs of the Times

On a recent visit to New York City I was astonished how the dining capital of the world had changed. There were fewer bars and taverns, more Starbucks, fewer hot dog and sausage carts and shocking news at each doughnut and chain pastry shop in the city.

On top of this, what tasted moist and even-textured on Tuesday, July1, tasted a bit less moist and rather inconsistent from a bakery standpoint on Wednesday, July 2.

Yes, the calorie police had invaded New York City since my last trip and the governmental arm of the help people stay healthy had invoked legislation that caloric signage be posted under each doughnut, Biscotti, Napoleon and Cherry Cheesecake.

Very disturbing news. If that wasn't enough, my friends, on July 2, trans- fats were banned as a usable ingredient in anything prepared in the city.

This is disconcerting on two fronts: First, does government know anything about cooking, baking or preparing food? Secondly, are these two acts of culinary kindness really going to accomplish anything for the not so healthy person who enjoys devouring Twinkies by the boxful?

A layover from San Francisco to Pittsburgh at JFK was most recent calorie count experience. After a meal of two Papaya King hot dogs, I wandered the food court looking for that special dessert. A glazed doughnut would have appeased the palate – until I decided that I couldn't top 2000 calories of hot dog and sugared water flavored with chemicalized Mango powder. I had to opt for a lesser evil- a chocolate doughnut which boasted only 8u0 calories.

I felt better with my ability to cheat the calories counters. Instead of opting for one glazed doughnut which would have boosted my one meal calorie count to approximately 2500 calories – including the sauerkraut, onions, pickles and ketchup, I made the decision to visit the chocolate doughnut bin where the count for chubbiness was only 80 calories. I felt a certain reprise thanks to our friendly chocolate low cal. So as a compromise I ordered three of them – two to accompany me on the plane- which would than only skyrocket my count to 2240 calories for the meal.

Great. Of course as I was sitting in the lounge, preparing to enjoy my chocolate trilogy of caloric intake, I realized that I had gotten in just under the wire. In a few days the chocolate doughnuts at Dunkin Doughnuts would no longer be boasting 80 calories as the substitution of trans-fats would probably alter the calorie count. And then, all of those restaurants, bakeries and cafes would have to change the signs that were only printed four months ago.

I guess none of the geniuses that passed the legislation that informs over eaters that they are over eating had ever owned a restaurant.