THE DIETER'S GUIDE TO WEIGHT LOSS BEFORE, DURING, AND AFTER SEX

An omnibus updating of a fitness favorite, Smith's guide addresses the abiding hunger of Americans to combine their sexual impulses with that streak of Yankee Puritanism that demands that all(!) activity serve some purpose. The Dieter's Guide, a '70s classic of humor and hedonism, shows you how to indulge with a clear conscience: No! It's not just sex! It's weight loss! With an abundance of charts outlining the number of calories burned by various sexual activities, a guide to the Dieting Lover's Love Signs, and a position paper on Masturbation, it's clear that Smith is aiming to be all things to all types of indulgers. Word to the wise: Smith suggests that this be used as "an informal guide rather than a rigid manual." He's not afraid to get brutally specific, however: Doing It For the First Time has a whole list of activities with associated calories burned, including "Fumbling around" (7 calories burned), "Desperately trying to put something somewhere" (18 calories), "Missing" (2 calories), and "Not realizing you missed" (55 calories). But you knew that. Bonus chart: "Important Life Events: How Long Afterward Should You Wait to Have Sex?" After dinner, hold off for 30 minutes, but after "your mother-in-law finally moves out," cut that waiting time down to eight seconds. The wide appeal of a book that combines dieting, sex, and humor plus should be formidable. Wake up, this isn't Playboy material anymore?people will love it.