Meet the networking challenge: advance planning and a few helpful tips will make you a...

Gracie Carolyn is the type of woman any property management company would love to have working for them. Hard working? Absolutely. And her professional attitude is exemplary. But Gracie also exhibits one particular trait that endears her to her bosses, owners, investors and leasing teams, alike

... she always speaks her mind. Admittedly, her honesty and outspoken manner sometimes rests a little uneasy on those around her, but everybody always knows where Gracie stands on an issue, and her reputation for hitting the mark more often than not and taking on the hard cases is legendary in her company.

But, put Gracie in a room full of strangers and all that changes. "I'm just not very good at networking." She'll tell you, "I look and see everyone talking like they all know each other," Gracie admits, "and I'm just not comfortable walking up and introducing myself to someone I've never met."

Gracie's not alone. Research indicates that somewhere between 40 and 50 percent of Americans consider themselves shy. We also know that dread of speaking in front of a group is the number one fear among the majority of American adults. So it should come as no surprise that many people share the anxiety of speaking to a total stranger in the company of a large group. Successful networking is tough for folks like these. They think networking might be good for them, but really don't see how anyone can get excited about it.

Making important industry contacts and adding business cards to your Rolodex is, however, a behavior that can be learned. And although we stand back and watch in awe at the networking gurus who seem to possess a gene for it, the rest of us will have to make do with these simple guidelines to motivate us to get off the sidelines and into the mix.

Prepare To Network

Filmmaker Woody Allen has been attributed with saying "80 percent of success in life is just showing up." Sorry Woody, that scene doesn't make final cut in my movie on networking. Instead, I'd say that 80 percent of the success in networking comes in the preparation. Especially if you're among the networking- challenged and you've got a big event coming up. There are several ways to help ease your networking fears.

Keep a "Headline News" file.

Preparing something beforehand reduces the pressure of wondering what you can contribute when engaging strangers in conversation. Draw from industry news, current events, sports, movies, television and any area of interest. Be alert for opportunities to chime in on the subjects being talked about by the people you meet. If you're traveling, the local newspaper is a good place to look for material. If you don't have anything to say, listen with interest and ask follow up questions. Showing a genuine interest in the opinions of others is always a safe position to take.

Create a list of key people you want to meet.

By focusing your expectations you have a better chance at seeking out and meeting the individuals who you determine will make the best contacts. Once you have your list made, seek out acquaintances that might be able to help you with an introduction. Perhaps they have people on their list that you can help them with. Look on the Internet or in business publications to learn more about your target companies.

If you are attending a tradeshow, spend some time going over the list of exhibitors and select those who you want to meet or obtain information from. Especially if you are a buyer in the situation, once you get on the tradeshow floor you'll have a better chance of not being overwhelmed by all the companies and people you encounter.

Have a clear message that describes you.

Put yourself in the contact's position. Determine what you have to offer that will best serve the needs of your target market. Prepare a simple and dear message that best describes who you are and give your listener a hook to help them remember you. Design both a short and long version of the answer to the question, "What do you do?", but don't let the long version run more than 60 seconds. Practice this opening line until you can deliver it confidently. Consider a tape recorder, video camera or bathroom mirror to help you practice to make your introduction casual and conversational.

First Impressions

Networking is about getting noticed, and being remembered. It's also about making an impression strong enough that when the business cards are pulled out at the end of the evening and sorted through to be filed or tossed, your card makes the contact's Rolodex.

Your appearance is your first impression.

Dress the part. If you're not sure what to wear, call someone and ask. Even if you're a big fish, you never know who you're going to meet. Enter a room exhibiting the body language that says you are someone to be noticed and worth talking to. Stand up straight with your shoulders back and head up. As you move through the crowd, make eye contact when the opportunity presents itself and be aware of opportunities to join a group or engage in conversation. Remember that you are making a first impression with every new person that you meet.

Show genuine enthusiasm.

Most people would agree that enthusiastic people are memorable. Enthusiasm creates more enthusiasm and everyone likes to be around people who genuinely get excited about conversation, meeting new people and talking about business or personal events. When given the chance, don't be afraid to show enthusiasm for your work in a non bragging way. Create a positive experience and leave an impression that will make others glad to see you coming when you approach them at the next function.

Build rapport by listening first.

Rapport is playing a game called "I'm like you." Having an attraction to the same things provides an instant bond between two people. Simply showing interest in what the speaker is talking about implies a shared affinity. That's probably why people love being listened to, because good listeners provide them with instant affirmation. And, because so many people listen so poorly, good listeners really stand out in a crowd. Encourage people to talk about themselves and look for opportunities to interject your own input when the chance arises. Being a good listener provides the best area of opportunity for the networking-challenged--all you have to do is listen, smile and nod.

Make Yourself Needed

Looking for opportunities to be helpful is one of the most important attributes of the successful networker. Providing information or resources while seeking to obtain the same is networking in the truest sense, an equal give and take of the currency of relationships.

Have an idea to give away

Ideas enrich people and leave them better than before you met them. Sharing freely when given the chance opens the door for the long-term relationships that give networking the potential for meaningful experiences. The free exchange of useful information makes you stand out in the crowd. Become a valued resource, seeking nothing in return, and your contacts will be sure to think of you as part of their team, instead of an outsider trying to sell your way in.

Volunteer for committees.

Becoming a part of the inner working of an organization provides valuable visibility and the opportunity to get to know others in the more intimate setting of the committee meeting. It not only shows you to be selfless giver of your time and energy, but also gives the people you meet a chance to see what type of person you are. Volunteering is a must for the networking-challenged because it reduces the magnitude of the group to a more manageable size. After they get to know and trust you, others on the committee will end up providing important introductions that you might otherwise miss.

Don't be afraid to show you have a need.

Buyers, in particular, may have a hard time networking for the advice and information they need to make educated purchasing decisions. The tradeshow floor is the perfect place for a savvy buyer with a need to maximize their time and energy to learn about an anticipated purchase. Develop a list of questions that you have about what you want and be ready to share it with the suppliers who might help you out. Don't be afraid to reveal your plans because you'll be inundated with sales people. Politely curtail self-centered sales pitches by letting sellers know that you are only seeking information before deciding which companies to schedule for final proposals.

A Follow-Up Sets You Apart

Relationships must be managed and cared for if they are going to be given a chance to thrive. And the benefits are long lasting. Networking offers the opportunity to build a cadre of contacts that will provide expertise to complement your own talents. Know enough people that know things and you can know everything. On the other hand, networking provides the contacts you need to build your business and set yourself up for future sales. Follow up makes all the difference.

Don't make promises you won't keep.

The trail of business relationships that never got off the ground is strewn with lunches that were never eaten, golf games that never got played and phone calls that never got made. Talks cheap. If you say you're going to do it, make sure you follow up on the promise. Don't mislead people with either the false promises of opportunities to do business or vague inferences that your product can be the answer to all their problems. Telling the truth works in almost every situation.

Be in tune with the time clock of the follow up.

Effective follow up has a time that is all it's own. When you go back to your office and face the challenges of the day-to-day workplace, follow up's clock is ticking. And, if you miss a beat because you get too busy, you miss the opportunity to cash the symbolic check that was written when you met that person. Follow up, in the form of a call, an e-mail or a handwritten note, or delivery on a promise helps you to be remembered, but only if it gets there before the dock winds down. After that you're just another unidentified blip on the radar screen.

Network for the long run.

Don't expect every person you meet to immediately provide you with an opportunity. Professionals look for long-term relationships and win/win situations. Buyers want to make intelligent purchasing decisions and that takes doing some homework. If a relationship can produce a positive benefit immediately, that's great, but patience and nurturing, with the sincere goal of mutual benefit, is worth pursuing, too. At the end of the day, all most buyers and sellers really want are reliable contacts that they can do business with, and have everyone be happy about it.

Will these tips work for our powerful property management professional Gracie Carolyn? "I recently took the advice of a friend and joined a women's business group," she reports. "I need to give them a reality check on the feasibility of interrupting my day for a two-hour lunch, but I went with a friend to the first meeting and I met some very nice people."

Somehow it wouldn't surprise me if Gracie is soon running these meetings.

* Never pass up the opportunity to meet new people.

* Amortize your investment in networking functions by arriving early for meetings and staying late.

* The tone of your voice may be more important than what you say Lower pitched voices make listeners take you more seriously.

* Don't be looking around the room for your next prospect. Listen attentively by standing on the balls of your feet, leaning forward slightly and maintaining eye contact.

* Don't attempt to sell anything too fast. Make a good first impression and follow up to be able to provide more information.

* When you get your chance to engage in conversation, be brief and to the point. Be memorable and you'll have the chance to tell it all in a follow up meeting.

* If you feel nervous before a big event or tradeshow, that's normal.

Robert Hammond is the Principal of his own consulting firm in Atlanta. For more information, visit www.roberthammond.com.