My Big Fat Funeral

Being the trim, athletic specimens we are, this thought had not occurred to us.

If you, however, are among the millions of Americans who are morbidly corpulent, then now is the time to get your mind around the idea of your burial.

Specifically: where will your dearly beloved find a coffin big enough?

Answer: the Goliath Casket Inc. of Lynn, Indiana., maker of oversize coffins since 1985.

That's the year Forrest "Pee Wee" Davis (no kidding) quit his job as a welder in a casket factory and told his kids, "Boys, I'm gonna go home and build oversize caskets that you would be proud to put your mother in."

And on that cheery note, Davis converted an old hog farm (no kidding) into a factory dedicated to the needs of the obesely departed.

Now run by son Keith, Goliath Casket makes 400 to 500 supersize coffins a week. The biggest are 52 inches across and fit a corpse up 1,000 pounds. Prices range from $2,000 to $4,000. Styles include the Harvest (regular), Heartland (medium) and Homestead (large).

With demand growing, Goliath has branched out into consulting work to address the many issues involved in an XXL farewell. For instance, it's not always possible to hold the service in a narrow-doored church or funeral home. Goliath has advised on funerals conducted in parks, sports fields and garages.

So rest in peace--on your sofa, La-Z-Boy or wherever, comfortable in the knowledge that if your clothes aren't fitting, at least your memorial service will.